Return to Holy Name Cemetery in Jersey City

On Saturday June 14, the Hudson County Historical and Genealogical Society had a cemetery tour scheduled.  The tour included St. Peter's Cemetery and Holy Name Cemetery.  Unfortunately, due to bad timing and road work on Exit 14 C on the NJ Turnpike, I didn't get there in time for the St. Peter's portion of the show.  But I did get to Holy Name early to look for a few plots and headstones.

Let me back up for a minute.  Before going to the tour, I decided to do a little research to see if I could find out if my Cavanaghs are buried at Holy Name.  In case you don't remember, my great grandfather William "Pop" Bergen had two sisters: Catherine (Kate) who married Bernard Cavanagh, and Mary, who married Timothy Kennedy.  I had previously found that the Kennedys are buried at Holy Name, and I planned on looking for the headstone.  So now I called Holy Name to inquire about Bernard Cavanagh.  Just so you know, I have talked about the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Newark website before and how you can look up burials.  The Kennedys were not listed on the website, so I figured I would check Cavanagh.  When I called, I was told that he is buried in Block B, Section 12, grave D.  There are several others buried there with him, including Catherine Cavanagh in 1940, Charles Cavanagh, aged 10, buried in 1928 (I believe he is the son of Bernard and Catherine's son, Charles), Edward Cavanagh in 1954, and lastly, Mary Cavanagh in 1989.  So the night before the tour, I checked to get the plot number for Kennedy.  I realized that it was the same plot.  So the Kennedys buried there are Timothy Sr, Mary (Bergen), and Timothy Jr.

Fast forward to Saturday, and I get the the cemetery office and ask where the plot is located.  The woman gives me a little map and off I go.  Within about 15 minutes I came across this headstone:

Typical one word epitaph, story of my life (or at least my research).  No list of occupants with dates of birth and death.  There is not even a mention of Kennedy - Oh well.

So what do I do while waiting for the tour?  You probably don't remember, but I had found someone on my dad's side who is buried here too.  My great grandfather "Big Mike "O'Dea had a sister Mary, who I wrote about before.  She married John Sterling and had several children, one of them was Margaret (Maggie), born in May of 1872 in Sanford, NY.  In 1899, she married a man named Thomas Keogh, and they had a child, Ellen.  They lived with John and Mary in Jersey City, but in June of 1900, Margaret died and I found her buried in Holy Name cemetery.  I discovered this about 2 and a Half years ago.  At the time, I was told that there was no marker on the grave.  We'll since I'm here and have the time I decided to check.  The office told me where she is buried and off I went in search of disappointment at finding no marker.  That's when a funny thing happened.

                                  

Would ya look at that.  A flat marker with names and dates listed, go figure.  And how about those dates, quite a time frame between the first and second burials - like 104 years YIKES.  So who are the Zarembas?  Not a clue, but you can bet that I am going to try to find out.

On my way out, after this great success, I decided to check for one more stone.  My mom's parents: Edward L and Catherine L Bergen.  I found them right where I had found them before.  So I will wrap this up with another success:

                                 

So all in all it was a good day.  By the way, I did meet up with the tour and it was given by a very knowledgable member of the society.  He talked about the history of the cemetery and of some of the famous burials there.  One of the biggies was Mayor Frank "I am the law" Hague, who ruled the city for decades.  It was very interesting, and I am sorry that I missed St. Peter's.

Now I can start looking for the Zarembas and their family connection.  I also have some more stuff to get from the Archives.

Happy Anniversary - June 12, 1948

Yes, this is when it all started for my generation of Bradys.  This date may not live in infamy for the rest of the world, but it's a biggie for us, this is my parent's wedding day.  They were married on this day at OLV. Every self-respecting Irish Catholic resident of Jersey City knows what these initials stand for - Our Lady of Victories!!

Here is the marriage certificate:

                                                  

Witnesses were dad's brother Frank and mom's cousin Florence Markey AKA my Aunt Florence and resident McConville and Bergen expert.  Speaking of Aunt Florence, she identified a number of people in a picture from my parents' wedding.  The reception was held at the Swiss Town House, 3312 Hudson Ave, Union City, NJ at 12:00 noon on the same day.

I also found a picture of some of the guests at the wedding in an old photo album.  I got Aunt Florence to identify some of the folks in the picture - because I had no clue.  Luckily this particular table was a group of mom's family.  So I labeled the people who Aunt Florence identified and here is the picture:

Wow, how's that?  Not too shabby.  So, let's start from left to right in the front row.  The man at the far left is Vinnie Fox.  I am told that he used to date Florence at one time - matter of fact, his sister Kathy married my mom's brother Ed.  Next is the lady to his right, who I do not know.  Then we have the Riedenger brothers -  Arthur, Jackie and Eddie.  You may remember that I did a blog post about Arthur Riedenger when I found his burial in Ocean County - surprisingly close to my home.  Next is Ferdie Parrot - I gotta admit that I remember him and his wife "Queenie" - but I'm a little foggy on Queenie's real name.  I also know that she is somehow related to "Cookie" - Queenie and Cookie always confused me for some reason. 

I have to interrupt with a quick story.  I recall the family going to Uncle Ferdie and Queenie's home for a party.  We were in canoes on the lake (Lake Hopatcong?), and Aunt Ruth tipped her canoe.  My brother Jimmy, who was just a kid at the time, jumped out of his boat and swam over to rescue Aunt Ruth from drowning (in the waist deep water).  In all fairness, he had no idea that the water was shallow and he still swam to her rescue.  His bravery was rewarded by Aunt Ruth with a crisp $100.00 bill.  We almost had to revive him.  That is my main memory of Uncle Ferdie and Queenie.  Back to the photo.

Next is Arthur Riedenger, Sr - Yes father to the Riedenger brothers (he looks like another brother), unfortunately I don't know much about the Riedengers.  Next in line is Peter McConville.  He is the brother to my great grandfather Edward McConville, unfortunately Peter would die in 48 days on July 30, 1948.  I remember talking to mom about him at one time and she said that he used to manage an apartment building in Brooklyn.  She also said that he used to have this concoction that he used to snort up his nose to clean his sinuses - no not cocaine - more like a saline rinse or netty pot.  She said he was never sick a day in his life (until July 30, 1948 I guess), he made his own toothpaste and had all his own teeth!!!  Sounds like quite a catch.  But seriously she said they all used the saline solution and were very rarely sick.  The other thing about Peter McConville is that he was the first McConville of this clan to be born on American soil, in 1869.  His siblings were all born in Manchester, England.  Next is mom's brother Bill, he had walked mom down the aisle that day.  Uncle Bill would later live in Cranford, NJ and he was the entertainer in the group.  He would sing in a Barbershop Quartet.  Matter of fact, when I was a cop, I was working outside the Ocean Grove Auditorium in Ocean Grove, NJ and they were having a big Barbershop Quartet concert.  As I was patrolling outside - who walked up and said hello but my Uncle Bill.  I don't know which one of us was more surprised - but it was probably me, cause I had no idea that he was singing there that night.

Now we will take the back row from right to left, starting with Alice McConville, who is kinda hidden behind Peter McConville (her uncle).  I think I told you about Alice in previous posts so we will move on to Florence McConville Markey, Alice's sister.  Florence - or Aunt Florrie, as we called her - is mother to Florence Armstrong.  Next to her is another sister, Edna, who is the mother of the Riedenger boys.  I remember Alice, Florence and Edna from when I was a kid. We saw them occasionally when they would visit us or we would take the drive up north to visit them.  Next is Aunt Gertie (Gertrude Rothchild) who married Uncle John McConville (who is next in line).  I was only 8 when Uncle John passed away, but I remember Aunt Gertie, cause she lived in Ocean Grove for awhile - I think on Franklin Ave, and she died in 1976.  Uncle John served in WWI (I think) and returned home.  He was Catholic and Gertie was Methodist - so the Catholic Church said he could not marry her.  But I am told that they married anyway shortly before he passed away - but I wish I knew the whole story.  Next are two more women who I don't know, and then we come to Lucy McConville.  She married James "Matt" McConville, (brother to John, Florence, Edna, and Alice).  The little girl next to her is their daughter (Alice, maybe), and Matt is not in the picture. 

That about wraps it up, we made it around the table with assistance from Aunt Florence and only a few unidentified guests.  I think there is a picture of dad's side of the family in the album somewhere - but the Bradys were not real big photo takers.  Besides I don't have anyone around from Dad's side to ID the Brady guests.

I enjoyed that, I remember some of these folks and have fond memories of them.  Most of them - as usual - are funny ones.  If it wasn't for this wedding, my siblings and I would not be here, neither would our children or their children, etc..  My daughter was married this past September, my brother's daughter is getting married this July, and my sister's son is getting married in October.  So there are going to be plenty more wedding photos soon, with new generations at the receptions.  So hopefully someone will still be around and do what Aunt Florence did for me, and identify old family members for some future genealogist in the family.  I hope so. 

Happy Memorial Day

I know its been quite a while since my last post, but I have been very busy opening a pool that is too cold to swim in.  Anyway, I felt it necessary to post today and just mention a few of the veterans in the family.  I realize that Memorial Day is to remember those who gave their lives, but I figure that being a veteran means that you were willing to make the sacrifice - but were fortunate enough to not have to.  The more I think about it, there was one veteran who was killed in battle and he was in my wife's family.  He was Major Jacob Brown, who was the commanding Officer  at Fort Texas during the Mexican War.  He was killed 6 May 1848 defending the fort.  When the commanding General Zachary Taylor (yes the future president) came to the fort, he renamed it Fort Brown in his honor, and the town that grew up around the fort became Brownsville, TX.  So, Brownsville, Texas is named after my wife's 3rd  Great Grandfather.  I actually found a drawing of his death (this was before cameras) and here it is:

Pretty cool, huh.

Before I start, let me just say that there are too many veterans on my wife's  side of the family to count.  If I were to include them, it would take me days to complete it.  But, I will add one other person - my father-in-law, Benjamin F VanVliet, who served in the US Air Force.  I believe he served during peace time - but he served.  Okay, two people, my brother-in-law, Benjamin F VanVliet, who served in the US Coast  Guard, also during peace time - but again he served.

But now on to the many veterans in the family.  I have to start with my dad, Tom Brady, who served in WWII in the 34th Div of the 5th Army.  He served in North Africa and Italy.  The battle that he talked about the most was Monte Cassino.  He didn't talk about the war much, but when he did the topic was usually Monte Cassino.  His two brothers: Jim and Frank, who both served in the US Army Air Corps.  They were both shot down over Germany (at different times) and were captured.  They were POWs  and wound up in the same POW camp, and (legend has it) they escaped together.  Yes, they were quite a story.  My dad's younger brother Paul also served in Korea in the early fifties. Matter of fact, he was in Korea when my brother Paul was born.  Quite a coincidence they have the same name huh?

Now my mom's two brothers also served in WWII.  My Uncle Ed Bergen served in the US Navy.  He served on the USS Monssen DD436 and was serving on board when the ship was sunk during the opening actions of the Naval Battle of Guadalcanal in November 1942.   Three quarters of her Officers and men were killed or wounded in the battle, but Uncle Ed survived, after spending a night in the water.  Uncle Bill, was a second Lt in the Army.  I don't know much about his service, but I think he was in the Phillipines for a time.  I also know that my mom's father, Edward L Bergen, Sr. served in the US Navy during WWI.  He was assigned to the USS Frieda from 10-14-18 to 11 -11-18 (Armistice Day).  I don't know anything about his service, and I found a State of New Jersey Service Record for him at the NJ State Archives.  That's where I learned the ship that he was assigned to.

I know that there were numerous other cousins and uncles (aunts?) who served our country in various military actions, but the last two I will mention were unknown to me before I started this never ending hobby. The first is Andrew Brady.  Andrew is the brother of my great grandfather James E Brady.  I found his service almost by mistake - because I was looking for something else.  I came across a file card for service in the Spanish-American War for Andrew Brady of Scranton, PA.  The card says that he served in Porto Rico (that's how they spelled it).  This is all I have for him.

Next is James Bradley.  James is the brother of mygreat grandmother Madge Bradley Brady.  James (1876 - 1928) served in WWI, and is buried in St Vincent de Paul Cemetery in Minersville.  I did find a copy of his burial card:

Well, that's all I have for tonight.  I know I left out a lot of veterans, but maybe I'll make a list for Veteran's Day of all of those that I can find and what conflict they served in.  But for now, thank you all for your service.

Patrick Bergen and Mary Fitzgerald

The last sibling of my Great Grandfather William "Pop" Bergen that I will talk about, is his older brother Patrick.  Patrick was born in July of 1859 to Edward Bergen and Mary Malone in Ireland - nothing  specific- just Ireland.  The only way I found a date was the 1900 census, which asked for the month and year of birth of everyone counted.  So I think that is as close as I will get to a birth date for him.

Patrick married Mary Fitzgerald 4 Feb 1886 (hey they just had an anniversary this month) in St Mary's Church in Jersey City:

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I found this on familysearch.org.  This one does not say that they are married at St Mary's, but a little birdie told me that's where it was.  I'm not sure where they lived at this point, but in the 1900 census they live at 280 Sixth St in Jersey City.  But before we get to 1900, we have another blessed event (the wedding was the first):

Yup, they had a little girl and you will never in a million years guess what they named her.  Okay, so they weren't very creative.  They named her Mary, born 10 Aug 1888 and baptized two days later on 12 Aug 1888 at St. Mary's church.  The same place that they were married two years earlier.

Now let's move on to 1900 and the aforementioned census.  The 1900 census was a good one, they asked a lot of good questions.  Such as month and year of birth, number of years in present marriage, place of birth, year of immigration, number of years in US and if naturalized, and the ever popular occupation.  There is one more interesting piece of information, it asks "mother of how many children" and "number of these (children) living".

Okay, let's get to the 1900 census.  This census has Patrick and family living at 280 6th St in Jersey City, which looks like an apartment building because there are eight families with the same address.  Patrick is listed as 40 years old, born in July 1859 and married for 14 years.  It says that he came to the US in 1861 (which I think should be 1871), he is a naturalized citizen (I gotta look for his papers in the archives) and his occupation is horse dealer (in Jersey City - who would have guessed that).  His wife Mary, is listed as 35 years old, born in September 1864 in New Jersey, married for 14 years.  She is the mother of one child, who is still living and listed next on the census.  Next is their daughter Mary, she is 11 years old born in Aug 1888 (we knew that from familysearch.org) and she attends school.  Next is Catherine Fitzgerald, age 60, born in Ireland in April 1840, came to the US in 1860.  She widowed and the mother of three children, who are all still living.  Next in the household are the remaining two living children of Catherine: James age 25, born December 1875 in New Jersey, his occupation is listed as Rail Road Laborer Freight, and last on the list is Thomas, age 22, born October 1877 in New Jersey and he is a plumber journeyman.  Tells alot about the family and how they all tended to stay together.  I just realized that I never found them in the 1910 census, but I found them in 1920.

In 1920 it is just Patrick, his wife Mary, and their daughter Mary living at 199 Eighth St. in Jersey City.  This census adds a year of naturalization for Patrick - 1894, and his occupation is now a commercial cattleman - like his brothers William and Thomas, and his brother in law Timothy Kennedy.

One more find before I finish up this post.  I know I've said it before, but the best part of blogging is the research I do before I post a blog.  This time, I was researching Mary Fitzgerald and I realized that she was born in New Jersey, so I was checking FamilySearch.org and I found this:

Yup, I think it's her.  True to form, no one seems to notice her mother.  It makes sense, according to the 1900 census she was born in September 1864, and this fits.  But I wouldn't have found it if I wasn't blogging.

So, in the end Patrick dies at St. Francis Hospital 13 Aug 1933 from what looks like heart disease and prostate hemorage.  He is buried in Holy Cross Cemetery with his brother Thomas.  Mary dies 10 years later at Jersey City Medical Center from cancer of the sigmoid (colon, I think), on 26 Dec 1943.  She is buried with her husband in Holy Cross.

The last thing I noticed is that the informant on her death certificate is Margaret Henzey, who is living at the same address 272 9th St. Jersey City.  Who is she?

The Legend of "Baby Jack"

This is about as big a mystery that I have tried to solve in my capacity of "Family Detective".  The Legend of "Baby Jack" is a mysterious story, and some people believe that he never existed - or at least have their doubts.  Legend has it that my dad had a brother named Jack, who was born in Jersey City on December first, but no one seems to know the year.  Some say that he was born sometime between my Uncle Frank and Uncle Paul.  That would put his birth between May 1924 and June 1929.  The story goes that at the time the family lived in a cold water flat in Jersey City.  According to Wikipedia, a cold water flat is an apartment without hot running water, apparently they were fairly common through the mid twentieth century in large cities. Typically they did not have built in showers or heat.  Water for bathing would have to be warmed in a pot on the stove and put in a tub.  They typically did not have central heating either, so people would have to use space heaters, hot water bottles or electric blankets for warmth.

So much for the history lesson.  Apparently Jack was sickly and in the cold apartment he became sicker and died within a couple of months.  He was supposedly buried in a potters field somewhere in an unmarked grave.  Most of this information was passed on to me by my cousin Linda, who heard the story from her mom - who is my father's sister and my Aunt Margie.  Linda says that every year on December first, her mother would tell her to say a prayer for "Baby Jack" because it was his birthday.

I have been to the NJ State Archives looking for a birth certificate - but they only have birth until the end of 1923.  I have checked 1921 to 1923 with no luck.  Today I checked 1921 to 1930 for a death certificate, with the same result.  I have also called all of the cemeteries in Jersey City that have sections set aside for a Potters Field - but none have a John Brady buried there.

I saw an article about Hart's Island in New York, which is an island used as a Potter's field in New York. The cemetery is actually cared for by inmates from New York City Corrections - Riker's Island specifically. The Mormons have a microfilm list of burials there, and I ordered it through the local Family History Center.  "Baby Jack" was nowhere to be found.

I also saw a presentation about Snake Hill in Secaucus (the same place that Thomas Bergen was the Deputy Fire Chief) and I found a website that had a list of the burials there.  This is probably as close as I will get to a complete list, and still no "Baby Jack".  I have a feeling that a lot of infant burials may not have been recorded - especially in a potters field, but I will keep looking.

When I recently attended Ancestry Day in Philadelphia and heard about the New York City indices for births, deaths, and marriages - as I wrote in my last post - I had a great idea.  I would check their databases for "Baby Jack".  Brilliant!!! Except for one detail - it is only an index.  Care to guess how many John Bradys died in New York City in the 1920s.  At 15 bucks a pop to figure out which one is mine - if he was born or died in New York City - this would not be a cost effective method.

But I'm not through yet.  I tend to believe that "Baby Jack" did exist and that he was born and died in Jersey City.  Even if I cannot find a birth or death certificate for him, I would be willing to bet that he was baptized.  So my next move is Seton Hall University, which is my alma mater - I spent, what was then, the best 6 years of my life.  They have an archive for the the Arch Diocese of Newark and it should have all of the baptismal certificates for that time frame.  I may need to narrow down my search to the Parish where I think he would have been baptized.  I think it would have been All Saints Church - same place as my dad.  So with any luck, the myth of "Baby Jack" will soon be a fact.

Ancestry Day in Philadelphia

Yesterday, March 15th, my friend George and I spent the day in Philadelphia at the Convention Center for Ancestry Day.  It was hosted by the Historical Society of Pennsylvania, and was an entire day (about 8:00 AM to 4:15PM) of speakers from Ancestry.com.  The speakers were very good and spoke on a variety of topics.  They included: Getting the most from Ancestry.com (this was in 2 parts), Using AncestryDNA to further your research, Mid-Atlantic Records on the website, and last was Sharing your Family Story - which I am doing right now.  It was a very good day.

One speaker was Crista Cowan. She  was very good and gave plenty of tips for using Ancestry, which I could really use.  They also talked about what new records are available on the website and it just so happens that they now have some indices of Births, Deaths and Marriages in New York City.  These include:

• An index of New York marriages 1866 to 1937
• An Index of Deaths in New York City 1862 to 1948
• An Index of New York births 1891 to 1902

Today I started a more informed foray into ancestry.com with good results.  So In the search mode on ancestry, I first chose the set of records that I wanted to search. This will make it a more productive search. If I search all of the records, I will get literally hundreds of thousands of hits, but by narrowing the record set, I get results from that record set only.  I decided to do an easier search first so I searched the marriage records for my mother's grandfather McConville.  Edward S McConville and Hannah Sullivan were married in Brooklyn in the 1880's.  I entered Edward S McConville in the search box and my first result was his marriage to Hannah on 24 Jun 1888 in Kings County (Brooklyn).  Certificate  number 2398.

     

                                         

When the list of results appears, it has a link to order a copy of the certificate.  It will cost $15.00.  The site say to order a "certified" copy, but when I go to the order form it asks your relationship and what purpose you want the certificate for.  I chose "historical or genealogical", and the cost of $15.00 was in my shopping cart.  I am going to have to check into this before ordering.

One more thing, at the bottom of my results list for my query of Edward S McConville was another McConville - Mary E. McConville and Robert J Milford.  Sound familiar?  You remember!  Yes, Mary Emma is Edward's sister and Aunt Florence told me about her marriage to a Milford.  Well, they were married 3 Sep 1885, certificate number 3003.  I definitely have to check before ordering this one.

                                            

                                           

Then, I decided to go for the gusto. I know that Edward McConville's parents lived in Brooklyn - and died there, as best I can tell.  So I entered his father's name - Peter McConville.  I used him because I have an old "family tree" that one of mom's cousins did, and it does not give a date of death or a place of burial   If you remember one of my previous posts, I found Peter in the 1870 Census in Brooklyn, occupation was Boat Builder.  In 1880 Catherine is listed as a widow - so Peter must have died in the 1870's.  When I entered Peter McConville this is what popped up:

Not only does it give me a date of death for Peter McConville as 18 Jul 1874, but it also gives Catherine's death (third result below Peter) as 22 Nov 1913.  I knew she died in 1913 from a "family tree" that my mom had given to me that one of her cousins had sent her and it says she is buried in Calvary Cemetery in Brooklyn.  So why stop here.

Just for laughs, I searched Peter McConville (son of Peter and Catherine and brother to my great grandfather Edward McConville) in the marriage index and I was suprised to see this pop up:

I was surprised because as far as I know, Peter never married.  This record says that Peter McConville married Ann Beaumont on 18 Oct 1898 in Manhattan, NY.  This calls for another telephone call to my mom's cousin Florence Armstrong.  I hope she can shed some light on this.  If that doesn't work, I may have to spend fifteen bucks to unlock the answer to my latest burning question: Who is Ann Beaumont???

More about Mary and Timothy Kennedy

Well I told you that there had to be more than just a marriage and one child, and I found more.  Some good news, and some not so much.  The first thing I found was this little item on ancestry.com:

Yeah, not so good.  This is the death of young Timothy Kennedy on 19 Jul 1898 at the age of 1 hour.  So the joy didn't last very long, but the next thing I found was good - another birth.

This one was a girl, born 30 Sep 1900, again in Jersey City.  They named her Mary Agnes and she was Baptized on 14 Oct 1900 - but I don't know where because I didn't order the record yet.  So now they have a little girl.  But I still can't find any census records for Mary and Timothy (and now Mary Agnes).  Mary Agnes was probably not born in time to make the 1900 census, but she should be in the 1910 - but I can't find them.

So, the next thing I found was more bad news - it seems that sometimes the only news that you can find is bad news.  I was looking through some on line newspapers and found this item:

This was in the Jersey Journal 17 Oct 1916.  He was only 46 years old but died after a long illness. I'll see what the illness was when I get a chance to go the the archives and get a death certificate.  The obit is not big, but it has alot of info.  It says he lived at 168 Pavonia Ave - sounds like they lived near Catherine and Charles Cavanagh and Thomas Bergen.  He was in the ocean cattle shipping business - I think the whole family was in the cattle business.  I remember my mom (as well as Aunt Florence) telling me that my great grandfather William "Pop" Bergen was involved in the same business.  Florence said he used to work on the cattle boats from Ireland.  This also says that Timothy is buried in Holy Name - well knock me over with a feather.  So I checked the rcancem.org (that's the website for the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Newark Cemeteries), but I could not find him.  So I called Holy Name and told them I checked the website and could not find him, but I had the obit saying that he is buried there.  The woman checked the card file and found that he is buried there in Sec B grave 12 D.  So I asked if Mary was buried there also and she told me that she was buried there in 1942.  I did not ask about Mary Agnes, I guess I didn't want to press my luck.  But then I remembered that the Hudson County Genealogy and Historical Society has some Holy Name burials on their web page, so I tried that.  There she was - Mary Agnes Kennedy, buried 4 May 1978 in the same plot.  So now I know for sure that they are all there.  Truth be told - I was a little worried that the obit was not for my Timothy Kennedy.  After all it only says that he is survived by a wife and a daughter - God forbid they should actually mention surviving female relatives by name.

So that's my story for tonight and when I get a chance to go to Holy Name, I will get a picture of the headstone.  I almost said "If there is one?" but mom's family was pretty good about marking graves, so I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.